The average cucumber is at least six inches long
Cucumbers stay hard for a week.
A cucumber won't tell you size don't count.
Cucumbers don't get TOO excited.
A cucumber never suffers from performance anxiety.
. Cucumbers are easy to pick up.
You can fondle cucumbers in a supermarket... and you know how firm it is before you take it home.
Cucumbers can get away any weekend.
. With a cucumber you can get a single room and ... you won't have to check in as 'Mrs. Cucumber'.
. A cucumber will always respect you in the morning.
. If you can go to the movie with a cucumber and see the movie at a drive in you can stay in the front seat.
A cucumber can always wait until you get home.
. A cucumber won't eat all the popcorn.
. A cucumber won't drag you out to a John Wayne Film Festival.
. A cucumber won't ask: 'Am I first?'
. Cucumbers don't care whether you're a virgin.
. Cucumbers won't tell other cucumbers you're a virgin.
. Cucumbers won't tell anyone you're not a virgin.
. With cucumbers, you don't have to be a virgin more than once.
. Cucumbers won't write your name and number on men's room wall.
. Cucumbers don't have sex hang-ups.
. Cucumbers won't ask: 'Am I the best', 'How was it?' 'Did you come?', 'How many times?'
. Cucumbers aren't jealous of your gynecologist, ski instructor or hair dresser.
. Cucumbers won't ask about your last lover or speculate about your next one.
. A cucumber will never make a scene because there are other cucumbers in the refrigerator.
. A cucumber won't mind hiding in the refrigerator when your mother comes over.
. No matter how old you are you can always get a fresh cucumber.
. Cucumbers can handle rejection.
A cucumber won't pout if you have a headache.
. A cucumber won't care what time of the month it is.
. A cucumber never wants to get it on when your nails are wet.
. A cucumber won't give it up for lent.
. With a cucumber, you never have to say you're sorry.
. Cucumbers won't leave whisker burns, fall asleep on your chest or drool on the pillow.
. A cucumber will never give you a hickey.
. Cucumbers can stay up ALL night and you won't have to sleep
in the wet spot.
. A cucumber won't work your crossword in ink.
. A cucumber isn't allergic to your cat.
. Cucumbers never answer your phone or borrow your car.
. A cucumber won't eat all your food or drink all your liquor.
. A cucumber doesn't turn your bathroom into a library.
. Cucumbers won't go through your medicine chest.
. A cucumber doesn't use your toothbrush, roll-on or hairspray.
. Cucumbers won't leave dirty shorts on the floor.
. A cucumber never forgets to flush the toilet.
. A cucumber doesn't flush the toilet while you're in the shower.
. With a cucumber, the toilet seat is always the way you left it.
. Cucumbers don't compare you to a centerfold.
. Cucumbers won't tell you they liked you better with long hair.
. A cucumber will never leave you for another man, another woman or another cucumber.
. You will always know where your cucumber has been.
. A cucumber never has to call 'the wife'.
. Cucumbers won't tell you a vasectomy will ruin it for them.
. You can have as many cucumbers as you can handle.
. You only eat cucumbers when you feel like it.
. You don't have to wait for halftime to talk to your cucumber.
. A cucumber won't leave town on New Years Eve.
. Cucumbers never want to take you home to mom.
. Cucumbers never expect you to have little cucumbers.
. It's easy to drop a cucumber.
. A cucumber will never contest a divorce, demand a property settlement or seek custody of anything.
ראשי
צ'אט
25-08-2008, 14:26
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